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Please give a short bio of yourself for our readers. Well, I was born in Seoul, South Korea and was adopted by my parents when I was six months old. I don't know most of the details surrounding my adoption, and I don't especially care to seek them out, since it allows me to formulate more exciting stories. For example, I actually have a "birthmark" on my left shoulder that's just a tiny blue dot, as if it were inked there. Perhaps a marking left from when I was just a genetic experiment in Korea gone awry, so they put me up for adoption? Eh? Other than that, I've lived in New Jersey all my life, and I don't hate it, despite all the nasty jokes you hear about the state. They're all just jealous. Jealous, I say! Why did you choose this username? My AOL screenname has been "PsykoFish" forever. Or at least for the past seven or eight years. Unfortunately, Diaryland wouldn't let me have the name "psykofish.diaryland.com" when I signed up, saying it was already in use, though I haven't found that yet to be the case. I went through two or three other names before settling happily with "pezloko," since "pez loco" translates roughly from Spanish as "psycho fish." I kept the intentional typo "k" for sentimental value. And because I found it witty. Why do you keep a diary online? Because there's just something about spilling your brain on a page and hoping someone out there will read and understand what you're saying. Also, it keeps some of my friends updated on my life without my having to tell them about it directly. In a diary, where I'm not writing specifically TO anyone, I feel somehow safer telling more than I would if I were just talking to someone about my day. How important do you think a layout is for a web-based diary? Would you also comment on yours? !WARNING! !Pretty much standard response ahead! It all comes down to the content, ultimately. If you like what you read, you continue to read. For a prime example, look at Bobby. (perceptions.diaryland.com) He's got a grey box and some text links, but gets over a thousand hits per day, and most everyone enjoys what he has to say. I've also seen some diaries with great layouts that I absolutely hated, for content reasons and sometimes because they LiEk TotaLLy TyPPeD LikE tHiSSSS!!! HOWEVER, layout does matter. If I run across a random diary and decide to take a look, I'll probably be more apt to read it if the layout catches my eye and isn't one of those generic Diaryland eyesores. (Sorry Andrew.) Also, layouts can say things about your interests or personality and can add to the overall diary reading experience. My layout I made while I was still in the "I want it to be winter" mode. I was just looking to make something pretty and wintry. Come spring, there'll probably be fruits and flowers all over the place again. In your diary, you often record how well you did in an exam or something similar. Is there any particular reason that you feel you have to do well in them? I was always one of the kids who insisted her "A" work get posted up on the refrigerator. Diaryland is now my refrigerator. Probably just so I can prance around saying, "Oooh, look at the good grades! I did so well! I'm so smert! You can ignore all the other dumb stuff I do now...I got an 'A'! Praise me!" Though I realize it doesn't especially negate, in my and my readers' eyes, the fact that I have a tendency to act in stupid, stupid ways, it makes me feel better. We all have to be good at something sometimes. You say in you diary that you can start to get paranoid when you're with you friends and you feel as if they are "sick of you." What do you think causes this? If I start to think about it too hard, I'd say it's most likely underlying problems with self-confidence, though I've never thought of myself as having problems with low self-esteem. Part of it, I know, is that one of my best friends for years WOULD get sick of me (and not just me, any of her friends) after some length of time, depending on her mood, and would expressly act that way. So, even though she's out of my life now, I still feel as though I have to constantly be on the lookout for signs that my company is no longer welcome. Then I get paranoid and start believing I see "I HATE YOU" signals from whoever I'm with, when I really don't. It's crazy, and I hope it eventually goes away. In your diary, you mention how you've never been able to make yourself cry, and that you envy people who can. How do you think being able to cry spontaneously will relieve your tension? There's something therapeutic in crying. Crying is something weirdly special to me. I don't do it all the time. I was brought up not to cry. But there's a feeling after crying, almost as if you've been cleansed. However, it might just be another one of those "If I could do/have [whatever], I'd be happy" theories in my life. Because I have many of those based on the silliest of things that rarely, if ever, turn out true. At Interview our last question is always reserved for fun! So here's yours: what would you do if you were stranded on a desert island with only a religious fanatic for company? [knowing that you have a passionate dislike of them] Island, huh? Drown the sucker. Unless the person abstained from any religious talk whatsoever. I actually know quite a few religious fanatics that I wouldn't mind be stranded on a desert island with, as long as we kept from arguments about faith. But if they started praying we'd be saved or something like that, I'd probably throw a coconut at their head. It's only right. Interviewed by Deepblueday
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