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Please give a short bio of yourself for our readers. I (the brunette) was born in South Dakota in August of 1975. That makes me 26, if you're counting, and it means I was born near the place and time of the stand off at Wounded Knee, for those who know anything about American Indian history. My parents got divorced some time early in my life. Mom, a veterinarian, moved to California. Dad, then a mechanic, moved to Iowa. Since they had joint custody, I grew up spending two years in one place and then two years in another. It sounds bad, but kids are amazingly resilient. I always think that when I watch movies where they show kids getting all heartbroken over a divorce or whatever. And maybe some kids do, but it doesn't speak to my reality. I just did what I did because I had to, and I adjusted. Some would even say I've turned out ok. Both parents eventually remarried. My relationship with my stepmother wasn't (and likely never will be) great. My stepfather, though, and m! ! y siblings (stepsister on mom's side, 2 half-brothers on dad's side) are all pretty amazing. When it came time for college, I headed back to South Dakota. I wanted a place where I could be away from my parents and yet safe, and knowing friends and family in SD helped. The four year biology scholarship didn't hurt, either. I did major in biology, but I also reconnected with my love of psychology and got a double major in both. I decided that I wanted to do psychological research on human sexuality, so I applied for a number of grad schools. Georgia was definitely the best of those I got into, and so I moved here in 1998, sight unseen, just me and a u-haul and a lot of moxie. I've never regretted it. I got my masters last May, and I hope to have my PhD in a few more years. Then I'd like to work at a college doing teaching and research in sexuality. Why did you choose this username? My middle name is Astra. (Yes, Blaise Astra, yes, it's real, and yes, at least one of my parents was a hippie.) When I was younger I decided that my middle name was damn cool and that it would be a shame if no one ever got to hear it, and so I started using my full name on school papers, checks, etc. I actually thought of AstraLounge before I ever had a diaryland account. It happened (I'm embarassed to admit) shortly after Smashmouth came out with their CD Astro Lounge. I don't even like the band all that much, but I was going to register a domain for myself as www.astralounge.com anyway. I liked how it sounded. But then I found diaryland instead, and the rest is history. (As a side note, someone has apparently since registered Astralounge, and the picture there is worth taking a look at!) Why do you keep a diary online? When I started, I was inspired by the now defunct Geek Chic, whose writing is much like a humor columnist's. However, I quickly moved away from that, as it's not my style. There are a lot of reasons for this diary, I think. First, the obvious. I like to talk. A lot. And I live alone, so having a diary gives me an outlet for thoughts from the mundane to the bizarre. I think I have two distinct styles of writing. There are my longer entries, which generally entail me telling a story of some kind or working through an issue that's been bothering me on paper. Then there are my shorter entries, which are usually a bit more humorous. Sometimes I do a weblog style thing where I link articles, but that just depends on what I find interesting and noteworthy that day. I prefer to think I'm somewhat entertaining, but I know I'm not always. I know there are days I'm downright boring. I struggle with that, because I hate to feel like a boring person, but some days there are just things I want to say. And if my diary won't listen to me, who will? It's an interesting tension between keeping my "audience" (such that it is) entertained and between being true to my own thoughts and feelings on any given day. Journaling serves so many purposes in my life. It's therapeutic, it's a way to exercise my creativity (especially in my fictional diaries, such as Electra and Blue), it's a way to record the history of my life, it's a way to communicate with friends and family who are far away, it's a way to allow my loved ones to understand me more, it's a way to keep me in the habit of writing, and it feeds my ego when people actually enjoy it. I've read this so many times in interviews on your page, but I am incapable of keeping a paper diary. I guess I just figure it's not worth recording if there's no one to share it with. (I'm an extravert in the extreme.) How important do you think a layout is for a web-based diary? Would you also comment on yours? Some of my very favorite diaries have very plain layouts with no images at all. They're all content and very little fancy packaging (although they still look nice and neat, which is a plus). Then there's my diary, which is image-heavy, colorful (if you like pink) and all about the snazzy package. I can't pretend I don't like a good layout. I wouldn't design templates for other people if I didn't. That doesn't mean I don't put thought into my content, of course. I'd never bother reading a diary with a nice layout and shitty content. Still, I'm a visual person, and to me, the web is meant to be a visual tool. I try to keep my page reasonably quick-loading, but I want it to be pretty, too. People either love or hate my current layout. I think it has to do with their opinion of pink, because even my friends that hate it say they like the design, just not the color. Still, I love pink and think my design is adorable, and it makes me happy. I'm all about pretty pictures and colors and fonts. Many of your diary entries are very humorous! How important is humor when writing? Thanks! I try. Have you ever seen those personal ads where people say, "I have a great sense of humor"? Do you ever believe them? I always think, "Yeah, sure. If you did, I'd be laughing by now." Humor isn't any more important in writing than it is in life. The world is a funny place. You just have to see the absurdity and laugh at it. I surround myself with hilarious people. They inspire me to be funnier. Kind of a vicious humor circle, if you will. Or, as we like to call it, the wheel of shit. How different was your college experience from the teaching end? How does your own undergraduate experience affect your teaching? Grad students are in a weird place with teaching, because we're teachers and students at the same time. We're kind of like the meat in a grad student sandwich, except this meat was left out in the sun and it's warm and mushy and it has no power and the bread doesn't appreciate everything it does and it doesn't even get health insurance. But I'm not bitter. Even as an undergrad, I was still in a leadership role (four years as an RA), so it wasn't a huge step from running a floor to running a classroom. I guess as an undergrad I never considered then how nervous the TA can be, you just sort of think it's their job, but I know some TAs who still find it pretty terrifying to teach. I'd say the one thing that my undergrad experience taught me was to be honest and flexible with my students. I don't pretend to know something if I don't know it, but I do try to find it out for them. I try to accomodate to changes in the schedule (for instance, after September 11) and to be reasonable at all times. I also try to genuinely listen to them, to respond quickly over email, and to really help those who are struggling and who are willing to put in the extra effort to meet with me. Those are all things I felt were effective when I was a student, so I try to incorporate them as a teacher. You mention that your diary is very public, with a link to on your home page, etc. Do you find yourself censoring what you write, as your family has access to your work? People who know me will tell you that censoring is really not my strong point. But I suppose I do a little self-censoring. My family has been known to stumble across my diary from time to time. I don't worry much about my mom reading it... there's nothing I don't tell her anyway. I'd rather my dad and stepmother not read it, because I do talk about some negative feelings I still have toward my stepmother. Additionally, I think there are some things about me (such as my sex life) that they just don't want to know. But if they do read it, I don't worry much about it, because that's what happens when you read someone's diary. I'm actually more concerned about students reading it than I am family. I'm sort of torn between the desire to live this very public life and to protect myself at times. There's a bit of an image that you should have as a teacher, and even if you teach a sexuality class you probably shouldn't sit around and blab about your sex life on the web, where it's easy for students to come across it. But I do, because I don't really get off on that whole privacy thing. Who knows, it may come back to bite me in the ass someday, but I'll deal with it when that time comes. There are definitely things I don't say, though. I have a private diary where I talk about those issues (private in the sense that no one knows where it is, as far as I know... not in the sense that it's a locked diary... even then, I can't seem to be entirely secretive). What do I not talk about? Well, that would be telling, wouldn't it? What's your favorite karaoke song...and why? Mmmmfff. Good question. Hard to say, really. I sing a lot of anti-men songs, but not specifically because I am anti-men. Many of them are just more in my range. It seems like altos are angrier at men than sopranos are. One of life's little mysteries. I'd say my favorite songs are what I call my Angry Woman Trilogy: I Will Survive by Gloria Gaynor, Goodbye Earl by the Dixie Chicks, and Hit Me With Your Best Shot by Pat Benetar. Why? Because they're in my range, I can sing them well, I like the variety of styles (disco, country, rock), and they tend to be favorites at the bar I go to. Plus it's just damn fun to sing Goodbye Earl with a thick fake accent! Interviewed by Witchgirl
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