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Please give a short bio of yourself for our readers. A real short bio would be "i'm a 19 year old female pot-head", but if your looking for more than that, I can oblige... Anyway, I am 19 years old, having been born on February 9, 1982 in Southeastern Massachusetts, where I still reside today. I've got a brother, whos just about a year younger than me, and we pretty much hate everything about eachother. I still live with mom and dad, but I don't see them much, because I work full time and go to school in the evenings, so I'm never really home. Basically I spent most of my teenage years being depressed and angst filled and miserable, for the most part. Most teenagers do, don't they? Anyway, I got pretty heavy into drugs around my senior year in high school, and barely managed to graduate. Sounds like your typical teen sob story, but I've managed to pull myself together over the last 2 years, and I've got myself in college full time, and holding down a full time job, and I'm more content with life than I think I've ever been. Things that I like to pass the time with are: smoking pot, watching television, driving, reading, writing, sleeping, and meeting new people. Why did you choose this username? To put it bluntly, im a heavy marijuana smoker. Saying that it is the bain of my existence is an exagerration, but its important to me. I've laid off the heavy drug use, and have managed to turn myself into a pretty productive member of society, but I couldn't do it without my daily marijuana fix. It keeps me grounded and minimizes my stress and helps me to maintain my busy schedule without getting too overwhelmed. So anyway, its a 2 step process--- 1. smoke, 2. exist. Why do you keep a diary online? I had a diary through diaryland back when it first started, in September of 1999, and at the time it was just a way to talk about the events of my day in a funny way so that my friends could read it and perhaps be amused by it. Now, though, my friends don't even know I have a diary. Its become my own personal outlet. Like a billboard for me to use to express whatever I want. I don't know... Theres just something really cool about typing up something, about absolutely whatever you want, and putting it out there for whoever may stumble across it to read. It also helps me remember certain important events in my life, and how they made me feel. Its crazy to look back at my diary from 1999, and to see how drastically I have changed in those 2 years. Its insane, really. How important do you think a layout is for a web-based diary? Would you also comment on yours? I think a decent layout is pretty much essential if you want people to read your diary. I mean, there is so much good content out there, that you can't possibly read it all, so I tend to go past the diaries with templates or boring layouts, in favor of a diary with a more unique look. You pretty much know that if someone took the time to make or come up with a really interesting layout, then their content is probably worth reading too. As far as my layout goes, I didn't create it, but I'm really proud of it. It was done by emystica, who designed it from ideas and suggestions that I gave to her, and she basically did exactly what I wanted. I had created my own layout when I started smoke-exist, using my limited html knowledge, and it suited my needs for a while, but I got to the point where I wanted something that fit me more, and emystica came up with exactly the right design. What does Smoke-Exist do for a living. Do you like it? What would you change about it? I'm not really making much of a living right now, but I'm a full time college student and I work full time, if that counts. Anyway, I work for the HoneyBaked Ham company, which at first sounds disgusting and wierd, but in reality, its the best job I've ever had. I don't have to touch or even look at ham, so don't start labeling me as a ham wrangler... I work on the phones, taking orders, as a kind of psuedo-supervisor, and for some reason, I've stumbled across the perfect job for me to do while putting myself through college... What makes Smoke-Exist cry? To be honest, I haven't cried in quite a while. At least a few months, I would say. The last time would have to be when my cat died this past summer. Thats not to say that I don't have a good cry every now and then. Anyhow, what really makes me cry, I would say, is losing people. There is really nothing worse than losing someone important in your life. So yah. Thats what makes me cry. What is your idea of the perfect relationship? One with no jealousy, or suspicion. The worst thing about relationships today, it seems, is that everyone is so jealous. No one seems to really trust eachother, and that lack of trust turns into possessiveness, and no one can really be happy when someone is trying to control them because they are suspicious that they might be out banging someone else. So trust and honesty, above all, make for a good relationship. And a mutual sense of humor is good too. No point in being together if you can't make each other smile. Tell me the most embarrassing thing you have ever done? When I was about 15, I got caught shoplifting candybars and gum from my local supermarket. They took me up to some interrogation room and bitched at me for a while, and then they asked me to lift up my shirt so they could check my waistband. So I lifted my shirt up and some of the gum I had stolen had melted from my body heat, and it stuck to my shirt and pants, and I was basically a big, sticky, shoplifting mess... Anyway, not much embarrasses me... Interviewed by Trinity63
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